Between Us Only! Still Burning Homes!
Between Us Only! Still Burning Homes!
This is in answer to the many fans’ queries that I do not write much amongst on other topics on the increasing marriages break-ups nowadays – some even long married couples.
Frankly, this subject has been covered by me many times before – and as early as at 6th August 2003 – titled ‘Burning Homes’! Please see my book Between Us Only! – www.majidbooks.com.
This is what I had said – Quote – But what is this new ugly and unpleasant development now in our homes? This ‘domestic violence’ thing? Do we need an excuse? The dishes and the foreign films and dramas that are beamed to our homes? Or is that the new in-thing fashion now, the provocations and ‘do not care stuff’ – followed by lifting of the hand and beating up that poor creature that bore you babies you call your own and have made you proud too? Do you consider the effects on the children? Hey – what is wrong with us nowadays?
Is it the increased selfishness, materialism and blind emulating and copying of values that are not our own? Against the very fabric of our society in all aspects and values, against The religious peoples need to do something more in this field. And our elders and parents too need to get more involved. Including relatives and friends, who prefer the easy way out of not getting involved or be interested, or feign and pretend they do not know, or have not been told! This respect for the marriage institution need to be rekindled and nurtured back into being once again – coupled with our true values, traditions, customs and heritages!
Not forgetting honesty, loyalty, sincerity, genuineness and care and feelings for each other in the marriage institution! And watching the wrong messages and bad consequences that we are passing on to our kids and the future generations. Definitely marital bliss needs to be looked into – and domestic violence has to be put a stop to immediately first. People need to be open and talk to each other. If they cannot do it themselves, others caring MUST step in – before it is too late for everyone!! Allah be with us all – Amin! – Unquote.
This is what I had also said in my article dated 18th August 2010 titled – ‘Why Even Long Married Couples Marriages Fail Also!’ – I wrote – Quote – Have you wondered on this new phenomenon nowadays? Increasing number of married couples – some married as long as thirty years and plus – are going in for separation and divorces – and it can all be summed up under one line – Lack of Care and Communication Syndromes! Apart from the marriages of couples under Thirties that fail at an average of 33% in their first two years of marriage – a pattern that can be found in many countries of the world – and increasing – and including the rising economies like in India, China and Brazil and even the Arab countries of The Middle East – and particularly now in The GCC. Countries.
In actual fact, the latter has an increasingly alarming rate of divorces amongst the younger generation – stretching from even 1 day to 3 months duration in the first two years of marriage as being the norm rather than the exception! At an age that couples should be together to enjoy their long life together – and their grandchildren – many of the older couples are seeking separation and divorces like going in for hot crispy cakes! ….. Bottom line – it is not a question of being who is right or wrong – or winning in an argument! But in many cases of more than one – and more importantly nowadays – it is a simple case of what can lead to bigger more explosive and damaging things in life – some really unnecessary, uncalled for unwarranted and unwanted. Especially for a couple married so long!
Talking of separations and of divorces too! Especially in this now difficult and hart times in our lives now – when even the retired and pension salaries are no longer guaranteed or even safe! Money is the root of all evils – as they say! Or hungry stomachs! – Unquote.
For us Muslims especially – the coming Holy Month of Ramadhan is the month of compassion, kindness, caring, touch and feelings! Charity begins at home – let us all try extra hard – at least for the sake of our children (and grandchildren) – and for being good Believers too! As it is said – ‘following the steps of the husband’ and ‘following the steps of our parents – especially the Mothers’ is a sure way for opening the doors of the highest heavens for us – and avoidance of the punishment of the grave!
Take Care! Happy Ramadhan Greetings!
By Majid Al Suleimany